Many people think of dating as something for young 20 something’s but with many people starting over in middle age, there is a lot to be said for dating in your 40s and 50s.

Matchmaker and CEO of Exclusive Matchmaking Susan Trombetti offers some tips for dating later in life and what are the things to look out including red flags.

Dating in your 40’s often involves previous marriages and kids and though there is baggage there is also wisdom that comes with age.

“When it comes to dating, sometimes it sure does seem like you need to read volumes before getting back out there and taking the plunge. It’s overwhelming especially if you haven’t dated for a while,” says Trombetti.

Some dating red flags include the following:

Ongoing drama with an ex

This may not mean they are bad people but ongoing issues could mean they aren’t suitable to start a new relationship with especially since issues from their past haven’t been resolved. “They can’t help some drama… but they aren’t completely emotionally available to you when so much else is going on in their life. If they have unfinished business that creates emotional turmoil, you may need to give this relationship a pass.”

Kids wants before relationship needs

Kids needs are important and should be taken care of. That goes without saying. However kids who throw tantrums and have to have their wants met all the time is a no go as they may also try to sabotage the relationship as they may not like to see their parents dating and intentionally create distractions.

“Your kids needs should always come first before your significant other, but their wants shouldn’t.”

They aren’t good with children

At the other end of the spectrum also watch out for people who are rude to your children. It’s a big red flag if they can’t get along with your kids. “It’s ok for them not to have kids and not understand exactly what your parenting role is, but they need to be understanding and value family while supporting you.”

Asking for financial help straight away

Romance scamming is so popular these days. “There are so many financial cons out there, so you need to beware of anyone that asks for money. Do not give anyone money that you are just dating until you know them well and are in a long-established relationship.”

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