First dates are difficult and exciting at the same time. You’re both nervous and it’s the first time the two of you are going to spend a significant amount of time together. How long should it last?
It’s something that should be long enough to get to know a person reasonably well but short enough to decide to not become too boring should you realise there’s no potential, spark or chemistry.
Both short and long dates have their own advantages and disadvantages. How long a date lasts depends on how much time you have and what your goal is really. With work and household commitments, when it comes to modern day dating, time is a luxury.
So here’s the thing if it’s a fling, one night stand or hook up you’re looking for, a longer date may be needed so that you have time to build chemistry and establish trust. But if you have serious intentions in getting to know someone, it’s a lot better to have shorter dates so that you have time to get to know each other at a good pace.
Sometimes there are exceptions though where you plan a short date but you end up with so much in common and such a lot to talk about that you just lose track of time and that’s a good thing!
As a general rule, long dates are better for people who are good at conversation and people who are light hearted enough to enjoy any kind of environment. Most men and women are wary of dates that can potentially turn into an ‘interview’.
First dates can be magical or hellish. An off-putting demeanour, rude questions and weird and awkward moments can make you want to run for the hills. Safeguard potentially unwanted long dates by picking safe shorter options like a coffee date. You can always extend this if things start looking good.
A movie is also a safe bet as if the conversation is stifling you can politely say goodbye at the end of the film, and if it’s going well you can opt for dinner or supper afterwards.
Other safe options that give you time to decide on how things can go would be for example, attending a jazz performance or any live music performance, stand-up comedy or activity that doesn’t require constant engagement. Once you’ve decided that you have a lot to talk about then it becomes easy to take it from there.
So to sum it up your first date should really last long enough for you to chat and get better acquainted but short enough to get away if things are starting to go belly up.
Resist the tendency to let the other person call the shots on the length of time if you’re feeling uncomfortable and want to leave.