Surviving your first holiday as a couple

A holiday with a new beau or girlfriend is an exciting thought but it can also make or break your new relationship. So improve your chances of surviving both the holiday and the relationship with some ground rules.

Going on a trip with your partner is definitely going to reveal some incompatibilities but the trick is to figure out what works and what doesn’t. A good idea is to get a sense of what your new partner likes to do and how they like to spend their time on holiday before committing to go on one.

Imagine if one person’s idea of a perfect holiday is cramming as many things into one day as possible and the other person’s thinks the best kind of holiday is to do absolutely nothing but relax and laze by the beach or pool.

The clash may start even before you leave, for example one person may like to get to the airport at least three hours earlier and the other might be one who has no concept of time and often makes it to check in just before the counter closes.

So plan everything, discuss things before hand and sit down together to do the itinerary, that way both have a sense of how things are going to go beforehand.

Also as unsexy as it may sound figure out who is going to pay for what beforehand, otherwise there maybe hidden resentment and unplanned financial hiccups along the way.

Choose transportation that is reliable, a first holiday as a couple may not be the right time to choose a jump seat on a flight or a budget airline where you are going to be stressed about timing and seating arrangements.

Take the safe option and pick reliable air travel; the same thing applies to buses and trains at your destination. In addition be sure to pick a destination that isn’t too difficult to navigate in for example an English speaking country would be a safe option for first time travel where you know that communication isn’t going to add to the stress of coordinating so many things with a new person in your life.

Also remember not to be overly adventurous and plan a safari, bungee jumping getaway or a big ski trip. Play it safe and plan a small holiday first. If it’s early days in the relationship opt for a weekend away and that way you won’t be feeling stuck if things aren’t going well.

A group trip may also be a safe option as there’s safety and comfort in numbers when someone is relatively new in your life.

Be mentally prepared for arguments and disagreements along the way but understand that it’s not always about being on the same page but it’s about communicating through the disagreement that is going to hold you in good stead. Avoid sarcasm and snide remarks as tempting as it may be when exhausted and stressed from travelling. Remember your partner may be feeling just as out of their depth as you are.

Pressures on holiday are different from everyday life, possible jet lag (for longer journeys and air travel of course), general tiredness, currency issues to contend with, logistics and a slew of other issues that may crop up along the way.

Always remember that whatever you gravitate towards isn’t always what your partner wants to do so be sure to brief each other constantly and talk about what you both like, want and agree to do, so that there isn’t any resentment later.