Whether one is looking for serious love or just an encounter by chance, American adults say that they have used a dating site or app, however, with mixed experiences.
So it’s February and love is in the air. Or better still, love is in the bytes of a computer.
In a Pew Research Center study, of the under-35-year-old set, over half have tried using sites and apps. According to researcher Colleen McClain, the overall number, which amounts to 30%, is the same since 2019, the last time the center took a broad look at online dating.
“When we talk to users who have been on the sites more recently, we see that there is really a mix of emotions,” she said. “Everything from burnout to elation.”
“We see that Americans are divided on this,” McClain said. “Forty-eight percent say that dating sites are a safe way to meet people. A very similar share, 49%, say that they’re not safe.”
Dating sites
Of those who said that dating sites and apps have a mostly positive effect, 25% say it is because they have aided in expanding people’s dating pool. They likewise highlight how online dating has made it easier to meet people outside of one’s social circle, thereby increasing their options.
A 36-year-old female believed that these sites/apps allow people easier access to individuals they might not have the possibility of crossing paths with. Another woman said that these sites widen the pool of available persons, this from a 64-year-old.
Others said that thru the sites, people searching for partners gain the ability to assess people before actually meeting them.
Says a man who’s 43 years old, “You read people’s profiles and know what they are all about before reaching out to them. Cheaper than going on a date to find out the hard way.”
Or the 28-year-old female who said that with the sites and apps, it is “Easy to meet people. Easy to break the ice. Easy to size up people to see if you would like to really date them.
Stressful, dishonesty issues
There is a stronger consensus among respondents who believe dating sites and apps have had a mostly adverse effect. By far the most common response says that these platforms are settings for all types of dishonesty – ranging from people exaggerating the truth to absolute rip-offs.
“You only know what they want you to know. They lie about themselves to make themselves look good.” (Man, 58)
“People give a description of whom they want to be and not always how they really are. You can’t depend on everyone being honest about who they are on both the positive and negative sides.” (Woman, 40)
“I found there are a lot of scammers on dating sites trying to take advantage of others.” (Woman, 59)
Impersonal, meaningless
Still, others believe that online dating has made courtship more impersonal and bereft of meaningful communication.
“People don’t act like themselves online. No one is actually getting to really know each other. Communication is flawed from the beginning.” (Woman, 33)
“There is a constant influx of ‘new inventory.’ It’s made dating more of a shopping activity (consumerism) than an interpersonal experience (emotional). The ‘swipe right’ mentality starts to affect us in everyday life.” (Man, 56)
Can we find “The One” online?
Despite the dishonesty, the stress, and the scams, there is a huge possibility that online dating can be successful. Since everybody on a dating site is (seemingly) available, one has sufficient opportunities to place one’s self out there and find a good match. Compare it when one engages in social events where he/she is likely to meet new people, the pool of those who are single and looking is much smaller than when one is on an app or dating site where everyone is in the same boat.
Thus, if one is candid about what one wants, it increases one’s chances of finding a good partner on those dating sites and apps.
No matter the intention, there appears to be something for everyone when dating online. The important thing is to be very clear about one’s expectations.
So, squeeze in new experiences, learn a little about yourself, and don’t forget to have fun. Who knows, you may just meet your life’s most elusive dream partner.
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