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Paperclipping: When Your Past Sneaks Up Uninvited, Here’s How to Deal

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Meet the modern-day Clippy – “paperclipping.” You remember Clippy, right? That pesky paperclip from the early 2000s, popping up with annoying questions in Microsoft software?

Well, now it’s a term for those sporadic, shallow messages you get from people on social media or messaging apps.

Paperclipping?

In the dating scene, “paperclipping” happens when someone from your past suddenly reappears, even long after you’ve moved on, just to remind you he or she is still around (and still single). It’s like Clippy from Microsoft Word, popping up to offer assistance you hardly ever needed.

 Or imagine you’re minding your business when a “Hey, what’s up?” pops up on your screen. You reply, but the conversation fizzles out, leaving you wondering what the point is.

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The clearest indication of paperclipping occurs when there’s a prolonged silence in communication, succeeded by a message that leads nowhere.

A back-up plan

The paperclipper keeps you on their radar with minimal effort, maybe as a backup plan or just to keep tabs on you.

But why do people do it? It’s like keeping a door ajar for future possibilities without committing to anything real. They might be an old flame, a potential employer, or just someone not ready to invest more in you yet.

Recognizing paperclipping is key. Does the conversation ever deepen, or does it always stay surface-level? If it’s the latter, you’re likely being paperclipped.

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So, what can you do? Here are practical options —

  • You could play along with the occasional small talk, maybe they’re your 11th choice too.
  • Or you could ignore them and hope they take the hint.
  • Alternatively, you could confront them directly, asking why they’re only giving you morsels of conversation.

Whichever route you take, remember that paperclipping isn’t a sign of genuine interest. It’s more like Clippy—forgettable and ultimately not worth your time.

 Cover Photo: Depositphotos

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