Very often we know our relationship is deteriorating and that too rapidly but that sinking feel is usually ignored or we just can’t handle the idea of an impending break-up.
Here are some clues that things aren’t looking up in general:
1. Your significant other is spending more time with friends than with you. Similarly if you are spending more time with friends it could also mean that you’re feeling less connected.
2. You never argue. Although on the surface this may seem like a good thing but it actually isn’t because it just means you can’t be bothered to state your preferences, wishes or desires and rather just agree to get things over with. It means negotiating isn’t even needed anymore.
3. When something big happens in your life, they’re no longer the first person you run to and tell. Whether it’s a promotion, or a dressing down from the boss or winning an award, if your significant other isn’t the first to know that already says something.
4. Boredom and malaise in general. When boredom sets in in the relationship it usually has a trickle down effect to other areas of your life as well. Similarly if you feel like you’re talking and talking and no one is listening that’s another sign that your partner is just so bored with you or vice versa.
5. You feel alone even when you’re together. Even when you’re physically close to your partner you feel emotionally alone. More dangerously you start to wonder if you can do better. Maybe you’ve changed or your partner has and your interests are no longer the same and you’re now just going through the motions or in a comfort zone.
6. You’ve stopped caring about how you look. Weight gain, a slovenly appearance or just not being too bothered about how you look in general isn’t a good sign. Weight shifting can sometimes signify emotional eating or emotional upheaval.
7. Flaws appear larger than life. What used to be charming foibles now seem very annoying and you notice them more than anything else.
8. Sex isn’t what it used to be. This is common and may not signify anything serious at all but if it’s combined with some of the above it can be a tell tale sign. This is because sex isn’t just a physical thing in a relationship it’s emotional and allows both parties to be vulnerable and open with each other.
If any of this does apply to you, the writing may be on the wall which isn’t necessarily a bad thing. Either way you can take steps to correct it or wisen up to the fact that it really is the end and move on gracefully.